The Esteemable Acts Blog

Focus on what works--one day at a time!

Today I attended a class at church where the minister shared about the history of the church. In doing so, we took a tour around the beautiful Marin County grounds.  He called our attention to a fountain in the center of the garden with name blocks. Each block had been purchased by a member of the church tin support the building capital fund started years earlier.  He told us a story about an early member who, for years, was furious with the church because her name was misspelled on the block.  He said, "your name is spelled correctly." She insisted, "you're wrong."  Then one day he walked her aoround to the other side of the fountain where he showed her a second block with her name--spelled correctly.   His point in sharing the story with us was to recognize how easy it is to focus on the misspelled block, the areas of our life that aren't as we'd like them to be.  Yet it's takes a little more effort to step aside and see how mnany things are right and wonderful, and in fact as we'd have them.  That experience was a reminder---an esteemable reminder to take time to appreciate all that's working in your life.  

Self-esteem comes from getting through the bad days!

Have you ever had a day where you're REALLY off the beam? A day where, mistakes keep happening and there's no one to blame but yourself? A day where you forget something important, confuse an issue, don't remember to do something (or a lot of somethings), or otherwise mess things up?  A day where little stumbling blocks pop up everywhere? Well if you've ever had a day like that, then you can understand my yesterday. From problems with the airlines, rental car issues, and cat sitters--by the time my husband Richard and I arrived to our destination--Bangor, PA, I was spent.  I was so emotionally exhausted from the day that I just crashed. So what's the esteemable action in all of this? That sometimes stuff happens--even when you plan far in advance and reconfirm--but how you handle it is the key.  We all have to deal with stuff (bad days, annoying people, things not going our way, disappointments), and the truth is--we'll get through it.  It's our choice whether we get through it without taking hostages or creating wreckage along the way. There was a time when stuff happened and I made sure everyone knew it, especially Richard.  But the truth is, yesterday he and I did great. That was the esteemable act! Until tomorrow, have an esteemable day!

Finding out what you don't know is an Esteemable Act.

Being open to learning everything you can is an esteemable act.  How easy it is to become a mental loafer--just buying into any and everything others want to you know, rather than having the courage to research and gather the facts for yourself.  It's easy to buy into the spin and the manipultaion.  But as smart folks you know that a politician who, for years, has not cared about the working class, only big business, big pharmaceuticals, etc, but now wants to convince us they care about us--we know better.

On CNN tonight I heard a Republican strategist say something I believe, but was shocked he said it, "in polictics our job is to take the other side off guard and force them to spend time defending something, even if it's not true." It's the law of distraction. "The American people say they hate dirty politics, but when we play dirty, we win. That's the way the game's played."

Self-esteem comes from doing Esteemable Acts.

Many of you know I'm a self esteem coach, and a few of you know I'm also a lawyer, with a specialty in intellectual property--helping entrepreneurs protect their valuable copyrights & trademarks.  What you might not know is that I also do family law for fun and for free. My pro bono work allows me to help women take back their lives and their families. In the past few months, I helped a young mom get custody of her infant son, another young mother get permanent custody of her two minor boys, and offered advice and counsel to a young woman whose husband left her, after only one year of marriage, for an even younger women.  We're all called to serve in a variety of ways.  I feel blessed that I get to use all of my skills to help other women. Self-esteem comes from doing esteemable acts, and it's an esteemable act to be of service.